High n' Dry Podcast

Life is a Space Opera, So Simp for Jessica (Dune II): Episode #76

• Ryan Baron North and James Crosslin • Episode 76

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Prepare your palate for a sensory symphony, as we blend the rich notes of "Dune 2" analysis with the bold flavors of a whiskey tasting in this latest podcast episode. James Crossland joins me to dissect the latest cinematic adaptation, where Timothy Chalamet's performance and the film's world-building captivate as much as the whiskey warms. 

This episode is a landscape of contrasts as we celebrate the stunning cinematography of "Dune 2," while Rebecca Ferguson's portrayal of Lady Jessica steals the spotlight. We traverse the challenges of adapting such complex source material and delve into the strategic thinking of movie studios when expanding beloved franchises. From exploring the parallels between today's AI and the Dune universe's technophobia to comparing the sound and visuals with Zack Snyder's horrific "Rebel Moon," we offer a hearty critique with the help of our Missouri and Middleton guests to enhance the conversation.

As we conclude our journey through this episode, the future of the "Dune" series sparkles on the horizon. We speculate on the narrative's potential to mirror the longevity and evolution of the Star Wars saga, while envisioning a catastrophic Marvel-like expansion. The return of beloved characters, the influence of 'God Emperor of Dune,' and the growth of Frank Herbert as a writer—all are up for discussion. With a joint in hand and spirited dialogue, this episode promises an exploration as intoxicating as the beverages we're savoring.

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Ryan:

Oh, the new Fallout thing for Prime. It looked kind of cool.

James:

It looks good. Walter Goggins is one of the keys, the person from the past who turns into a ghoul. He's like the salesman for the vault.

Ryan:

Yeah, I do want to check it out. I do. I feel like it might actually be able to pull it off.

James:

They had the Mr Handy who says he's gonna, I just want to take your organs. It's like, oh yeah, they capture.

Ryan:

They fucking nailed that yeah, no, I do want to check it out. I've been, I've been looking at that. Maybe we'll do uh. We'll do a bit on if we manage to choke down the series, we'll do uh an episode on fallout it said that they're releasing it all at once, so it's a good.

James:

I mean it's yeah, probably do it pretty quickly after, if we, if we like it yeah, hey, no, I'm down, I'm down.

Ryan:

All right, well, let's get into this. So, hey, everybody, welcome to high and dry podcast, the only podcast keeping alive the fandom of star wars, now that it's being it's dead and being shoved into the grave. Where the podcast is going to keep it alive? Uh, kylo ren specifically. You know, we thought he was going somewhere and then just didn't.

James:

Uh, we're here making sure that he's the love star wars that's right, folks.

Ryan:

The final star wars podcast. Uh, thank you all for joining us with me, as always, james crossland, james seriously make some big billions of dollars in every movie but nobody likes it you weren't expecting that one were you. I went, I uh, I had to think of our dead fandom bit I'm doing fine.

James:

Yeah, I wasn't expecting that one doing fine. I uh. It keeps raining in san diego so I haven't gotten to do my hobby in a while, which blows. I'm trying to convince you to get into fishing there, because it's all you're. You're out in the woods, you're out in nature. I want to be able to when we hang out next, I want to be able to sit next to you and we you know catching fillet fish and shit and cook it right, right, wherever we are, because that sounds dope that would be pretty cool.

Ryan:

That'd be pretty cool. Um, I would like some of you guys to come on down here um june time frame, ish. I think that'd be pretty sweet, but uh you know if that absolutely, if that comes to pass, we'll, uh, we'll go, uh, go fishing yeah, are you?

James:

have you done much fishing in the past?

Ryan:

I did very, very briefly when I was a child. But, uh, you know, our father taught us and it turned into like that, uh, the whole situation where the sun looking under. But uh, you know, our, our father taught us and it turned into like that, uh, the whole situation where the son looking under the hood of the car, you know, and it just turns into him getting pissed.

James:

Yeah, yeah, my stepdad. My stepdad taught me to fish, and that was one of the one good things he did for me.

Ryan:

Well, well, we'll, uh, we'll, pick it back up in June, Umune, um. So hey, for those of you, just join us for the first time. We're high and dry podcast.

Ryan:

Today we're going to be talking about dune 2 just came out got a lot, a lot to say about, uh, timothy charlemagne and we'll uh, we'll see if you guys agree. Um, but yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna break it down, we're gonna throw down our sober thoughts, we're gonna throw down our golden path thoughts and then we're gonna do some what ifs of dune? And what's gonna make it so fun and exciting is that we're gonna do it drunk and high so, james, oh no, I wasn't prepared to be high today.

James:

No, oh god I forgot the format fuck, fuck.

Ryan:

Well, what are you smoking today? I'm completely unawares.

James:

Today I've got prepared sitting next to me, just randomly right, not on purpose.

Ryan:

I've got cereal milk, I think that cereal milk is a good one. You've had that a few times, yeah.

James:

Yeah, I think it's a really good philosopher's weed. There's a few weeds out there that have the, the right terpenes and that when they combine they just kind of like open your mind, like like some kind of spice or melange, some melange.

Ryan:

The spice melange Said said very little in the second movie.

James:

Yeah, didn't get a melange.

Ryan:

No melange, no, no melange. Well, I'll be joining you on the drunken golden path. Today I brought an old Forester.

James:

It's special.

Ryan:

It's Prohibition style 1920.

James:

So mean and a still in the backyard.

Ryan:

That's right, this guy right here. He's 115 horsepower. Normally I'm rolling in high 80s, low 90s. We're shooting up today for Dune 2 in the 115 horsepower. Let's see here Anything special I should know about this one. There is nothing better in the market is what it says so saith the bottle.

James:

This is a 57.5 alcohol by volume so it's also taking the 1920s uh advertisement laws and styles into account, where you can just say you're the best of something, correct, it was made in like a state park. It's a still in a state park.

Ryan:

It's prohibition style, it would be. Well, that's how they're able to say what they want, because they actually went out and did it. They did it prohibhibition style. It was made in a fucking still. They did it right Behind a chicken coop, guarded by some nutjob with a shotgun His mom, his mom, while he was out wearing his suit. And I'll be taking that down in my mountain glassware, the mountain collection. Nice, let's see how it goes. So this one, our first toast, simple as as written.

James:

As written.

Ryan:

As written.

James:

Lisa, now I've got ye. Oh, no my lighter's not working. Oh no, all right, I'll be be back. I'll take two on the next one keep going all right oh, I said to keep going. Well, I mean, what was I gonna?

Ryan:

say you know like we're conversational based, so I'll just unpause it.

James:

We'll just go ahead and take your puff come on. Oh yeah, that's good.

Ryan:

That's that cereal milk I was looking for yeah, no, I uh not gonna lie to you. That, uh, that was incredible, was it really? That was really good damn.

James:

Usually you don't have, as you don't have a good review like that right out of the gate you don't have, as you don't have a good review like that right out of the gate.

Ryan:

Now, that was fantastic. That was super smooth. It has the bite that you'd expect out of 115 horsepower. Um, but that was just fine. That's great, man. I'm glad to hear it. Yeah, let's see how the second one goes here. Um, so this second one, the toast, is and I'm we do this every fucking time, but I'm still, I'm never ready for our second toast. But our second toast goes out to our newest listeners, who listened to our total recall episode. Ooh, that's a good one. Yes, and that'll be from. That's interesting, a lot of missouri coming up, but, uh, we're not going to do it to them. Uh, I hate missouri.

Ryan:

Here's to who but not missourians necessarily necessarily here is to middletown connecticut, middletown connecticut our newest listeners, who shouldn't be in any way affiliated with anyone I have met in Missouri.

James:

Let us know if it's Middletown or Middleton or one of your crazy New England pronunciations. We'll get them right, maybe.

Ryan:

Maybe Leave yeah, after you like and subscribe. Leave some in the comments. Here we go. So here's to Middletown. Cheers, cheers, middletonleton. So what am I getting off of that second one?

James:

it's actually pronounced middle tune my middle town, that second one.

Ryan:

So I'm getting getting the caramelly notes, I think on the back end of that one. That's where you know your bourbon eventually tastes like a backwash out of a ashtray.

James:

Does this taste like backwash out of an ashtray?

Ryan:

No, no, something strange. Wait, oh, it's missing, you wish?

James:

you had the backwash out of an ashtray yeah well, I mean, so you're supposed to sip bourbon?

Ryan:

as any bourbon person will tell you. But doing this show I wind up fucking ripping a lot of bourbon.

James:

Well, how about on? Oh sorry, go ahead.

Ryan:

Well, it's usually when I do that second one where you get, just because I'm chugging it down, you just get that ashtray backwash taste. Not this time, not this time. That's that's interesting. Old Forrester, that's interesting.

James:

How about? How about? On this one you take half a shot and then sip the rest of it.

Ryan:

It's really because it is like it is extra proof right, it is like Well, I'm reading here. So during prohibition old forrester was bottled as medicinal whiskey under the kentucky permit number three.

James:

So that's uh, good old kentucky good old kentucky.

Ryan:

So here let's, uh, let's get that third one down. What do you want this third one to be to?

James:

This third one is to I don't know. The floor at the Las Vegas house finally got repaired. So this one is to your mom and brothers. They have a floor to walk on.

Ryan:

They have a floor to walk on. As written. Cheers as written. As written. Cheers as written. Man at 115 horsepower, man, this is gonna, this is gonna hit me like a sledgehammer to the fucking jaw yeah there's no fucking way, it won't, and so how about? Well, I, of course, was drinking during doom, but because I'm not in vegas anymore, I had to sneak in my alcohol like an animal. Oh my God.

James:

You should go first on sober thoughts.

Ryan:

All right. So my initial sober thoughts then, in the quickly diminishing window I have the cinematography was it was fantastic. Cinematography was fantastic Out of this world. Rebecca Ferguson Absolutely A fucking revelation. And yeah.

James:

Well, we already knew that she was great. Oh, she's amazing.

Ryan:

She is amazing. Yes, I would Kill any four people I know for her. All she needs is but to ask yeah, she was excellent at Dr Sleep. Dr Sleep, she was amazing as the hat. But yeah, yeah, sober thoughts, amazing cinematography. A little long, a little long. I had to. I had to pee like four times during that fucking movie well, to be fair, the book Dune is incredibly long, very long and I noticed in this second one.

Ryan:

So in the first one they just sliced everything off and I hate that and you could see what they were doing in the second one, because they put in a bunch of extra stuff that they didn't do in the first one and the first one was just dip in a toe test in the waters, like can we make money off of this? And then once they're like, all right, we can make money off of this, let's add a little bit more of the stuff.

James:

Yeah, and we can make it crazy now that it's been tested for marketability. We got people hooked.

Ryan:

Yes, yeah, and that's kind of sad, that's kind of sad, right, but that's the, that's what we're entering into, and I think I can go down a rabbit hole of AI taking over art while humans will be left to do the drudgery, but I feel that's a golden path, thought, yeah that's true. It's something that the Dune world doesn't have conveniently which is very interesting, conveniently and on purpose, if you've read the books they had AI.

James:

Yeah, there's a reason that it doesn't exist.

Ryan:

Yes, yeah, there's a reason that it doesn't exist. Yes, and there was a very large social upheaval, revolution, and AI and computer technology and all that kind of fun stuff was totally outlawed. So we'll see how I mean it. Vegas odds it's 50 50. And Herbert may have just been a perverted bastard or a future seeing genius.

James:

So he can be both a perverted bastard and a future seeing genius at the same time. I guess we'll see.

Ryan:

I'm excited to fight AI. We'll see how it plays out. You know as written. Well, James.

James:

Which has different connotations now. But back when Frank Herbert wrote the book jihad wasn't blowing up the two towers, you know the twin towers. It was just. You know, it was your quest right. It was a wave of change.

Ryan:

Yes, yeah, so that's more of an aligned thought also. Yes, well, uh, so what? What are your, uh, what are your sober thoughts on the film?

James:

sober thoughts. Like you said, cinematography is great. Uh, I think it's really important to distinguish, like graphics and cinematography. When we talk about how great the cinematography is in this, it's not just graphics and it's not just how beautiful it is. You know, all the shots also convey like like size, like the with the, with the worms. Uh, you know the way I I love the scene near the end, uh, where they actually attack, you know, the emperor of the city. They, they come in with the sandworms and what they do is they take an out shot which is like, okay, here's the specs of people and the worms coming in, and then they go to like a long shot and the worms are busting toward the camera and you've got the small people in the front and like the blurs of people in the foreground and, uh, I think they did an awesome job with conveying the size and scope of the worms and this fight that happened, where these worms take out like whole platoons of people yeah, no without a doubt.

Ryan:

And do you recall the very early on, uh, the scene where you had the harkonnen troops just sort of floating up the side?

James:

of the ridge. That was really dope. Even that was, yeah, it was silently, it was silently and it was so cool.

Ryan:

It was very cool, it was haunting the way it was shot. Yeah, it was haunting. It evoked so much, so much was going on there and yeah, so the cinematography was. Yes, it was gorgeous, and I would willingly watch the film again in a in a larger format screen.

James:

That's what I said to you before the before you went was I was like I'm going to go see this in IMAX when I can. I'm going to go to the best, the best IMAX screen I can go to see, with the best audio. Well, cause, the audio is awesome too.

Ryan:

Yeah, the audio was incredible. The music was used superbly there. There's definitely pieces of this that were masterwork. Um, but while while we're still in the sober thoughts, how does it compare to you, James, against the epic? That was Zack Snyder's latest film.

James:

Oh, Rebel Moon, Rebel Moon correct.

James:

The masterpiece that's Rebel Moon. The masterpiece, the masterpiece that's rebel moon. Uh, I think this really goes to show you know what audiences liked about this film and disliked about rebel moon. Because they're very the scale of the worlds and the ships and stuff is very comparable in rebel moon to this. Like that's what they wanted, was like that. Actually, rebel moon goes even farther with like travels from planet to planet that we never actually see the travel. Actually, rebel moon goes even farther with like travels from planet to planet that we never actually see the travel or rebel moon was off doing this while the interesting shit was over here.

James:

And that's what we, you know. That's really interesting because if people go back and listen to our rebel moon episode, what I talked about was that they failed to do any kind of like character we, they didn't do any. They didn't take any effort to make us give a shit about the characters. People people are always coming and going, but it wasn't in relation to anything, it was just people coming and going and, and in dune we got people coming and going all the time. Right it dune did the exact same thing, but it did it so much better because it was important to what was currently happening. It wasn't it wasn't just.

James:

It wasn't just a bunch of little vignettes that were shoved together. That's what it was. That's all it was.

Ryan:

That's all it was. So. So, for those of you who are joining us for the first time, I know we're starting to see new people coming in from Missouri and from fucking Middleton, middleton, come on, middleton. I know we're starting to see some new people coming in and if you haven't, we hated Zack Snyder's the Rebel Moon. That was bad. It was a bad movie. I was really happy to get one more at him.

James:

Yeah fuck that guy. Yeah, fuck that guy. This movie had a cohesive idea about what it wanted to present to you. Yes, in a cinematic way, with the cinematography, with the cinematography, with the music, with the story. All those things work together instead of, instead of being, I assume, worked on by totally different sections of Zack Snyder's fucking AI.

Ryan:

It was done they didn't even talk to each other and then the robot goes off and he's gonna have a sweet fucking movie, but anyway, and then that's an email to the sound designer and they're like fucking what? Um, but I will say this sober thought is dune, had the roadmap worked out. You know, zach snyder not a genius trying to do his own thing, yeah, herbert perverted genius, but still a genius had already written the roadmap and all that was required was beautiful cinematography and a masterful sound piece, and I don't know.

Ryan:

I don't know if I agree with that okay, well, good, well, how, how about we dive into the next portion of this and let's really fucking bite into this thing? Let's do it, yeah. So let's jump onto the golden path and let's get at it. Cheers.

James:

Cheers. Oh yeah, I have to imbibe more, okay.

Ryan:

God damn that Prohibition, old forester, holy shit, that uh vengeance man. Oh, and I love it. It's fantastic, god damn that's great, that's, that's wild.

Ryan:

so, uh yeah, for those of you listening, uh, old foresterster 1920, this bitch is going to cost you about 60 bucks though, so it's definitely a weekend pour, but you're in for a great time. It's got great flavor, great bite and shit it's 115. So, all right, everyone, welcome to the second portion of this. We have now attained the golden path, which the term was greatly lacking from this second film, in my opinion. But we're on the golden path now. Read the fucking book, james. What are your enlightened thoughts?

James:

well, the conversation we had leading into this was kind of like you know what? This was, a story that was already written and it and they followed all the same beats and stuff and all that had to be added with cinematography. You know that that's a fair. That's a fair look at it saying you know, zach snyder had to come up with this whole thing on his own. This is an adaptation, but it did take steps that were different from the way things were relayed in the book, that brought it into modern times, that looked at the story through a lens that audiences wanted. Right, because frank herbert in his writing you know, not really caring much for chani's point of view, let's be honest and in this movie, uh, something that I didn't come up with, this thought I heard it on a different podcast because I could, I had to consume a bunch of media.

Ryan:

Well, it sounds like you're well, it sounds like you're already on the way to. So I. So, folks listening, I have just come out of the theater and you're starting to talk. From what it sounds like you're about to start talking how chani. So, folks listening, I have just come out of the theater and you're starting to talk. From what it sounds like you're about to start talking how Chani is the one who breaks away from Herbert's work. Yes, and that's all my notes. Is the difference in Chani?

James:

Yeah, chani in this one was definitely represented more as a full, a fully fleshed out character, first off with her own opinions beyond the concubine.

James:

Yes, and in the end she's like she's meant to be, the the audience, right, she's the character that's meant to represent the audience's point of view. And when Paul decides, you know, she's the character that's meant to represent the audience's point of view. And when Paul decides, at the end, when Paul decides that he's going to marry Irulan, we essentially and we side with her Our thought is like oh damn, putting Chani, just this power struggle between Paul and the great houses, but that's what I'm saying about them moving away from it. We also introduced the white savior concept, which Paul, I'm sorry, which Herbert was not, frank Herbert was not concerned about.

Ryan:

Not at all. And one of the questions so I'm looking through my notes here as the guy who snuck not only liquor but notes into this theater. The question I had asked here within my notes was God damn it, where'd it go? Yeah, sorry, sorry, yeah. Is this a white savior movie? So yeah, sorry, sir. Yeah, is this a white savior movie, or have we? Become too preoccupied as a society on the race of a character.

James:

Oh well, this is Well. I think this movie definitely call it. It brings it into question. I mean, I'm sorry it brings it to the forefront of our minds purposely, brings it into question. What I mean I'm sorry it brings it to the forefront of our minds purposely when paul goes well in my studies, I heard it is that he literally is like like that's when she told, when she shows him how to sandwalk, when chani shows paul, how to sandwalk yeah, that scene where he goes well, in my studies it was you it said we were supposed to do this and she, like, looks at him like I've been doing this my whole fucking life.

James:

Like what do you insist?

Ryan:

But in that scene he concedes he does concede, and that's the that's.

James:

The point is that we're supposed to look at it and say, ok, paul's making progress and changing, but but where we take a turn is later in the movie, and I actually think it's better. And I actually think it's better. I think that Denis Villeneuve did a great job with this, making it clear to the audience in this movie, finally, that Paul is not a good guy, even though in some of the reviews I've read they still go. The good guys won and the bad guys lost. It's like what the fuck man? How could you even come?

Ryan:

to that conclusion. I'm also glad you brought that up, because when you were talking about Chani walking off, she is supposed like we. So this was where I saw our modern sensibilities taking a direct turn from what was written by Herbert in that, you know, chani's now her own character. She's her own thoughts, and not only that. She's representing whatani's now her own character. She's her own thoughts, and not only that. She's representing what you should be thinking about. This. This is creepy, right? Um, this is weird.

Ryan:

Uh, this is dangerous, but especially. You know, we talked about it way at the beginning, before we even talked about star wars. I'm in a different uh region. I'm in a different region of the United States right now, temporarily. I have now met many people who look at Chani as foolish, and that's very prevalent in my opinion now, sadly a very prevalent thought. What I think the audiences are going to see this, and this touches on something that we talk about frequently that we are not responsible enough for media yeah, because I felt it was incredibly clear that paul is not a good guy at the end of this.

James:

It's frustrating that someone comes out of the theater with a different conclusion. But no, the good guys did not win paul. Paul decided to take power. He was doing great when he was Paul. Paul decided to take power. He was doing great when he was like I'm not going to take power.

Ryan:

We were all like he wasn't even doing that in the book. Like he wasn't even doing it in the book, it was just straight to takes it and Johnny's like. Well, he had to do it.

James:

Yeah, she was making excuses for him and and he's, and that she was making excuses for him, and that's what I'm saying about. You know, it's not just an adaptation, it's been. He's clearly in touch with the everybody who worked on this movie was clearly in touch with what audiences wanted and the struggles that, as we would perceive them now if Frank Herbert was to write this book today. Right, it's a, it's a perspective that is not presented in the book and it's inserted into this adaptation and people love it. Well, audiences fucking love it.

Ryan:

Audience buckle up because Jason Momoa comes back and he addicts a woman to his dick. But uh he may.

James:

He makes, makes someone come when he climbs the ladder.

Ryan:

A woman who's clearly sapphic in the telling of it. So something I had wrote here was that they altered Chani to balance the situation to modern sensibilities. But I ask, was that unnecessary? Because if they follow through with the story, Paul becomes a soothsayer who dies in a fucking gutter, Right. But like that's that, that's a wild place for, I think, modern sensibilities or modern movie making, to take a hero.

Ryan:

I think I think they needed this to build up to that, because it's another it's a whole nother film, right, it's a whole nother story watching paul just become this fucking regretful hooded soothsayer in the marketplace who eventually dies in the fucking gutter.

James:

um, I'm wondering if you can do that. I think they're gonna do that. I think that's what they're setting up. Is that paul doesn't give a shit about the people around him? Really, he, he now is ambitious. He now takes his ambition and he's like I'm the only person who can see the path forward, it's my responsibility, and then we're going to see him crushed by taking that on and focusing on only those things that's something that a lot of us can relate to now.

James:

I think it may be. I think what they're working with is directly an allegory of ambition and work going into Messiah right, because his work takes him over. It totally preoccupies his time. He doesn't have any connection to his wife or his concubine that he's keeping, who was actually humanized in this movie. The humanization would come later in the series if we were waiting a whole nother movie. But it's hard to care about chani if we don't humanize her. Uh, people didn't really care about her in the first movie, if I remember, but now she actually turned into a character and I'm I'm digging it. I love Chani in this, in this version of this adaptation.

Ryan:

Yes, and so I'm. I'm wondering. So I mean, in in the novels, if we're going to follow Herbert, something has to happen that makes Chani come back. I mean, we, we watched the end of this film and she's getting ready to ride off on a worm and she's like fuck this shit. I'm not about to be a concubine, I'm not about to worship this guy and like, I'm willing to take fucking bets on what Hollywood's going to do here. I mean, are they going to follow through? Is she going to come back and be the concubine? Because if they do that, I mean they have to essentially, george RR Martin, the end of this shit.

James:

because you know they're moving into uncharted territory. So I think what happens is something that is very human and something that I think audiences will also connect to is that Paul is going to be kind of manipulative After he took the water of life. You can look back and say did taking the water of life change him, or is he now just who he was the whole time? Is it just releasing? Was he manipulative the whole time? He talked to her about being equals? Does this, did this just change his view? Is he, does he somehow have a larger game that he was, you know, disrespectful to his partner in this one time? A lot of audiences can relate to that either the one who's disrespectful to their partner, or being disrespected and still coming back and trying to salvage a relationship and trying to find that person that you knew before, or something like that. I think that I think that this could definitely be. Chani will make mistakes. Obviously she's going to make a mistake being with paul, but we really thought that in the, in the other version too.

Ryan:

Right, yeah, and so well but they're building up to it now. Well, I'm interested to see what happens here. What's what's sad about this? Um, from what I'm seeing here is that we have a second film that is taking the work and doing these things with like Chani and what we're talking about here. But no matter what they do, it's going to be tarnished by the first Dune. They did that was clearly. It's sliced off like fucking everything just to make a marketable film, and that, to me, rings as supremely depressing, just because that film will now always tarnish. What's happening now.

James:

It'll be less than yeah. And the fact that it was a part one of a story. It's not a full story by definition. Fact that it was a part one of a story, it's not a full story by definition. It's like almost entirely it is. It is entirely act one of a of a longer movie that that's always going to be a problem.

James:

It was never a complete movie and I hate that about part ones is they're never complete movies. I I have a feeling that rebel moon part two is not going to blow my mind, but really you gathered that, but just by making it a part one, it was already an inferior film. They they really shot themselves in the foot by doing that. She's been a limited series or something. Um but um, where was I going with this? Yeah, part one's always gonna suck.

James:

What I do see happening, though, is by chopping a lot of the background out of part one, we don't bog ourselves down. It makes it more accessible. It's long, right, it actually draws out the, the first act, longer, because it's giving you less information, but it's but it like with the visuals and the and the audio and stuff. What they were trying to do at the first movie was introduce audiences to a to the scope of the world, and I. What they were trying to do at the first movie was introduce audiences to a to the scope of the world, and I think they did a really good job in that, in that fact. But again, it's an inferior movie. It doesn't you have to watch both. It can't stand on its own Definitely.

Ryan:

Yeah, dune, one does not stand on its own, without a doubt, and that's just. There's just. That's very depressing to me.

James:

Don't let it depress you. It's like watch them together Together. It's a great story.

Ryan:

Well, now I can, but it's been two years now where I had to just hang out, and also even in the second one, for a very small instant they had made Baron Harkonnen as brutal and vicious as he was in the book. But then, in this effort to make fade more than just fucking, you know, staying getting stung, yeah, and they. He was completely outclassed, which I also feel was sort of a mistake. They, they. By putting all this effort into that fucking baby looking guy, they made the baron himself look pathetic and, yeah, I, I feel that may have been a mistake yeah, the baron.

James:

the baron, when you think about the character as a whole and the arc of his story, is pathetic. Everything he does is really pathetic. He expressed his brutality and his madness were symptoms of him being pathetic. Yeah, of course I said this when we talked about the Lynch version. I think the Baron Harkonnen that they had in the Lynch version was way better. Like that Baron was fucking chewing on the scenery.

Ryan:

I still remember it was so good. It was so good, oh yeah, no. And the scene with the Baron. Like I mean, we're talking about a 1980 film here with, you know, pre-star Trek, fucking Picard. I had to look away when that Baron was being nasty, yeah, so I feel that honestly, I think that the Baron is probably the biggest failure of the current franchise.

James:

Yeah.

Ryan:

They should have given the role to.

James:

I've said this before they should have given the role I've said this before they should have given the role to a big fat guy. You don't, if you're not a big fat guy, if they have to put you in a big fat suit, you don't understand. Every big fat, every big fat guy has listen. Every big fat guy has a mindset where he understands, like what it is to be, like gluttonously consumptive and you hear that colin farrell doing the penguin in the new fucking hbo series you don't know.

James:

You don't know what it's like to be a big, fat guy, and it's true, the way for herbert wrote it was like it was excesses and it was like depravity, where he, he eats. He eats more than he needs to and he knows it and he's depraved about it and that depravity has spread into other things and stone stars. Doesn't know what it's like to be a very rotund, gluttonous man and it sucks. Looking at media where and this sounds like I'm going- to joke about it.

James:

Where the big fat guy is not. Yeah, it's like big fat guy face, it's blubber face and I don't like it. We don't like blubber face. One movie I really like is Tucker and Dale versus Evil, because they have just a big guy, a guy who's fat in it and they barely mention it and he's just like. They just treat him like a regular person. Yeah, he's just the guy, it's fucking awesome, yeah, and, and a big fact I was able to do feel.

Ryan:

But yeah, just bringing it back around, I feel that the baron is this series greatest failure. Yeah, and they did it because there's some connotations. You know, if you read the novels you know the baron was, you know they're we're talking homosexual pedophilia and things of that nature and that's. That's a very scary thing to touch on. Cannibalism they didn't show the cannibalism. Yeah, those are scary things to touch on.

James:

He would fuck little boys to death and eat them Like he was not a, he was like a monster, and I think that I I saw in reviews that some people thought that the Baron was too silly. Now, which I can't imagine what they think if, if he actually did the shit he did in the novel.

Ryan:

Exactly. I understand that it's especially because we were talking about that first film was just putting the dip in the toe in the fucking hot tub of the money, seeing if there's a bite, and that that would be a fucking hard sell. I understand, but because they didn't do those things, there was that initial. So you have that initial comparison between Lato II and Harkonnen Because they refused to go into those things. It was just two fucking rich guys and we're only following this one fucking rich guy because he's the star Right when in the novel it was definitely like, hey, both these dudes are a bunch of fucking rich assholes, we should be eating them. But this one right here, this guy right here, he fucking eats people. They're pretty bad, yeah, and we definitely.

James:

They're like bad even for the thing.

Ryan:

Yeah, for the thing we're talking about, that dude is bad and we completely missed that in this particular iteration. And I feel like that's a failing. I feel that's a fail.

James:

Yeah, I agree, I feel that's a fail. Yeah, I agree, I couldn't agree more. I the thing is, I still love the movie. I didn't even know they missed that. I, they still love it. I still think that this movie was excellent. I, I, I will always wish that both. That they had a Baron Harkonnen who, who had like one of his mint hats over him, going the disease is being, is being what. What did he say? Oh shit, I can't remember the lynch version, but he was like where the disease is concentrating in you, it's growing in you, sire, and he had like these boils, just like oh, yes, I, I wanted that again yeah, I wanted I wanted that again.

James:

It was clownish, but it was clownish in a way that was unhinged.

Ryan:

Yeah, watching the Lynch version, I had to look away, yeah, for when he was coming at that one kid it was like shit dude, and we missed that. Yeah, and Alia.

James:

Where was Alia? Alia was still a fetus fuck. I wanted to one of the reviews are like that. He is the quits from the lynch version. I also thought alia in the lynch version was awesome. I thought that was one of the best parts. He is the and then she stabs him with the ganja bar and he's like that's what I wanted to see.

Ryan:

So yeah, for those of you who have not, uh, read the novel, I guess shame on you. But um, you're fucking imposers.

James:

But for those of you definitely not, it's one of the densest pieces of it was a tough read, jesus.

Ryan:

So, with all that being said, I sort of started to envision a situation here where dune now because disney has completely annihilated it, dune will become the new Star Wars, where that the level of mainstream mixed with the nerd dumb is able to overtake it.

James:

That's a possibility in any franchise, especially in the modern day. That's a possibility. Is that it's going to be modified into a cash grab, like that's the fear of any sequel or whatever? Yeah, I hope not. They did a really good job with this one. I enjoyed it into a cash grab, like that's the fear of any sequel or whatever? Yeah, I hope not. They did a really good job with this one.

Ryan:

I enjoyed it a lot. Well, I mean, I hope that it does, I am so pissed off at Star Wars.

James:

You're saying you hope that Dune Marvel is Marvelified.

Ryan:

Well no, not that it is marvelified, but I hope that takes on this place where I mean, like so star wars started in the 70s, finished in the 80s and we didn't destroy it until 2000. I hope that dune was started in the 2010s, finished in the 2020s and we don't destroy it till the 2040s. That'd be cool, that that's my hope, and meanwhile, disney is just forced to sit there with the billions of dollars they paid lucas and just fucking suck it.

James:

That's I just hope. I just want to see later the second learn about, about sticking salmon to himself and flee, fleeing himself through the sand, like, like swinging, like a swinging Spider-Man or an Aquaman or some shit. I want to see it Well you show me it.

Ryan:

Speaking of Aquaman, I just want to see a late 40 something. Momoa be brought back into this series to make a girl come while he's on the ladder. That's what I want to see, um I'm down, we'll get.

James:

I mean, I hope they get there, they have. They have to do the other thing first. If you're going, if you're going in order, I guess, I guess we could just see one movie cover all all three remaining books, if they just take the last concept and have, uh, have later the second, like looking back on on his life, which is kind of what the, the, you know god, emperor of dune is.

Ryan:

Yeah, yeah well I'm gonna incorporate the other books into that I'm interested to see. Uh, and you know, and for those of you listening now, um, just because this is a fresh film, a lot of things coming out of this. It's it's very topical. This will this will probably be a long episode, so if you want to hang around, if you want to, don't I?

James:

know, whatever, hang around and listen, hang around, listen you know we're getting't know.

Ryan:

hang around and listen. Hang around, listen. You know we're getting into some wild shit here. We haven't even gotten to what if, but I definitely want to see A man put on a giant worm suit have his own concubine. The concubine becomes a character. Well, and that's an interesting point there I'm glad I brought that shit up.

Ryan:

Uh, yeah, I brought that shit up too, because in that book, uh, there is a Chani, like a modern Chani, yeah, the concubine who's banging a worm man has a lot of thoughts and eventually kills the worm man. Spoilers for a book that's been out since for 40 years now. Yeah, so like well that that's wild it was. Was Herbert catching up before he got all pervy?

James:

Uh, what's going on here. It's a good point. I think that, uh, I think that he probably did grow a little over the course of writing this universe and it's great that he learned to humanize a character like that. And she is humanized Probably not as much as we'd like, right, I'd still probably say there's more humanization to be done.

Ryan:

Yeah, because in the in the book she still needed, uh, jason momoa to show up right and uh, that may happen again.

James:

it's, it's okay to need help, but she's, as long as she's like, characterized fully and uh, yeah, they didn't do that for chani. And it is the parallels between what they wrote for chani and what they wrote for, oh shit, what's her name? Whatever her name is it had an S, yeah, since it's been to, I never actually read the book, I only read, like you know, synopsis is, and so I don't remember, but there is a, there is a personality and like, characterization, and, but, but it is different.

James:

It is different because the concubine, like, lives under the servitude of this, this worm, emperor, for her whole life, which is different from Chani who, like, chose this path and they got betrayed. Yes, so it would, it would be cool if Chani fucking killed Paul.

Ryan:

I don't think it's going to happen, but that would be that'd be dope if Chani killed Paul, that'd be I.

James:

I doubt that's gonna happen that'd be a dope change to the story if that, if she killed him in the gutter yeah, that'd be really weird.

Ryan:

Hmm, interesting, well, uh also. I just pulled it up real fast, just so we can say it yeah, yeah, so later the second was killed by a lasgun by the assistant, nala Nala Nala, and they fell to their deaths in the Idaho River.

James:

Of course, named after Duncan Idaho, because he loves him some Duncan Idaho.

Ryan:

Yes, in idaho, because he loves him some. Duncan idaho, yes, and later the second was also uh, there's a mini-series that hits sci-fi, and he was portrayed by james mcavoy before x-men so yeah children of dune.

James:

The children of dune mini-series, yeah, which I'd love. I'd love to see and I don't think they went as far as they could in that children of d miniseries. I want to see it like, like this was done, but I want to see children of doom.

Ryan:

That would be fucking wild that will be because, because there's times there, what, um, so you have? Well, it's twins. So later the second and the other little girl's name there's twins, and I think it starts with an e I'll look it up there's a portion of the novel where there it's, these two kids essentially becoming fucking superheroes by attaching baby worms to themselves. Yeah, and that's a wild movie in of itself yes it.

James:

We already talked about how they weren't willing to go wild enough at these movies. I really hope they start getting wild, cause the next movie, the next movie, has some kind of wild stuff in it. Like they're going to enter, introduce the Tlaxi I think that's their name.

Ryan:

And they're Tlaxu.

James:

Tlaxu. Yes, it's hard. It's a hard thing to say, tlaxu. And they're laxu and they're, and, and they're like cloning tanks which is something that they didn't introduce in this one, and we also didn't see many mintats, and so they're going to introduce like a lot more shit, and how it actually interplays in like game of thrones style politics while also a holy war is going on.

Ryan:

No, that'll be, that'll be interesting, I mean. Well, so I guess they've already stated that they want this to be a trilogy and that will require especially with the way they've taken Chani, that'll require a lot of alterations to the original story. And you know, I'm wondering if they're going to bring Chani one way. I also have a this sort of fear, I guess, because we had the first film. They obviously put it out just to like hey, can we make money off of this? And then you have zendaya playing chani, but then on the other side of it you have florence playing the empress, and I'm wondering if it'll sort of become a competition of popularity over the next two years on which way they take the story.

James:

That would suck, I don't know. They did a really good job with this and so I don't know if I don't want to give them, I don't want to take away the goodwill they've earned in this film from making it very touching and very relevant and taking it in a direction that I feel, as a viewer, makes logical sense and actually makes it a little clearer than herbert's work, which is it's. It sucks that people are still missing it, but I think it makes it clearer yeah, no, and that's sad.

Ryan:

And you know like we've beaten the fucking dead horse. You know people aren't mature enough. Us half monkeys. As human beings, we're not ready for media like this.

James:

Well, the characters in this movie are monkeys, you know that's. The thing is that they're all half monkeys too. They're all humans and they're all making mistakes. And I have a feeling in the next movie, chani is going to make a mistake. And continue to be with Paul, because sometimes, you know, our emotions get the better of us and we make mistakes because we're people.

Ryan:

And we're not aware of the genocides that we're causing.

James:

She might even be aware. You know you can't say that Paul didn't finally give Arrakis to the Fremen.

Ryan:

He did the Fremen control Dune. Now, well, and I think that's a wonderful statement on it does not matter who it is the color of their skin, their creed. Statement on it does not matter who it is the color of their skin, their creed, anything like that. Once you give a human being power, it corrupts. Yeah, and that's just a sad fact of life.

James:

But I also think without being sad, even if they're saying all the right things. Even if they believe all the right things. Yeah, even if they're saying all the right things, even if they believe all the right things.

Ryan:

Yes, and this is a complex mess, you know, and I think that's why it didn't catch on as much as Star Wars did, because Star Wars is just so clearly black and white, and bad and evil, or good and evil, and I think that was what was always catching it up. But I think now we have audiences who want that distinction, who will not necessarily the distinction, but who want the muddled area oh, I gotta I have a fun.

James:

I don't know what you, the end of your experience was like in the theater. What did anything happen? Did anyone react after the, after the movie finished playing, I mean?

Ryan:

one guy was masturbating furiously well with, with the well, afterwards I took my denisey popcorn bowl, the special edition one, and I took it into madam webb and I just fucked the shit out of it there was no one in the theater so I was late.

James:

I was able.

Ryan:

Yeah, it was like it was made to do this, so I was really thrilled with that. I even wedged it in the two seats in front of me and was able just to go ham on it you turned around and we were actually facing away from the screen because it was such a bad movie, terrible. Absolutely terrible, oh God. But yeah, what was I saying? Oh yeah, so the reaction Fucking soccer balls.

James:

So after the movie ended, someone tried to start clapping, which was very funny. I thought that was so funny that someone started to go.

Ryan:

that's like, try it, he's just programmed to clap in a fucking movie. Yeah, and it was it was.

James:

It was very, very funny. Uh because the rest of the audience was like a full theater. Nobody else started clapping and that person just slowly just stopped. And uh because that's how you're supposed to feel, yeah, that's, that was someone who was like, yay, good guy won, and it's like no no, no, no, he didn't didn't win.

James:

Yeah, stillgar, as stillgar goes off to fucking conquer the, the universe, someone who was his friend and like, vouched for him and was like, hey, you know, we have a connection here, and that's the thing is that paul had no connection. He entered into this culture and had and, and saw resources and used resources and he didn't have that connection. But the, the water of his ancestors, are not in the, the siege to beer pool of life. His ancestors are not there. Their water isn't there. He's never had to to contemplate the mingling of of life over a vast amount of time and being in one place and having one reason why things are done. He saw resources and he went and used them to achieve his own goal they called it.

Ryan:

So in the first movie they called it. It was uh, desert power. You know, you have air power. Yeah, yeah, and that's, that's what he did that's what he did.

James:

He got desert power and and someone whose culture was a specific way and poisoned by the bene? Gesserit thousands of years ago. You know someone who understood the good parts of his culture that they developed, you know, uh trusted this guy and and he exploited the parts of the culture that that he used to manipulate them, that weren't even theirs to begin with, that were outside of their gathered culture and placed by the bene? Gesserit about a messiah. So it just shows the exploitative nature of like, in this case, a neoliberal. You know who's like.

James:

I have to do bad things to stop bad people, which is a very neoliberal mindset, like a him coming in and destroying an indigenous culture that doesn't even have capitalism. They don't like, don't even know what it is. You ever see anybody pay for anything? Because things are just based on need, because that's what you have to do to survive, yeah, when the whole world's out to kill you and take what you have. I love the scene where stillgar was like, even if we were, even if we were, you know, oh shit, what's it? What's the thing where you die because you don't have water, dying of thirst, oh, even if you're, if you're, yeah, even if you're dying of thirst, they would not drink from this water this is.

James:

This is sacred water and and and paul we kind of got foreshadowed of that in the first movie with the sacred date palms. Or he said you know, why don't we stop giving them water? People need that. He's like, no, this is a, this is a promise, this is like a legacy. This is sacred because it looks at a future where dune could be green. Yeah, and paul doesn't understand. Even after it's told him he doesn't understand.

Ryan:

Well, with that being said, people who were clapping at the movie, not realizing the bad guy, sort of won well, I mean honestly, there's no such thing as a bad guy. There's no such thing as a good guy.

James:

Everything's boring no, there are bad guys. No, these, there are all bad guys. No, but anybody who tells you bad guys don't exist, they're full of shit, those guys are bad also true.

Ryan:

Uh well, so anyone who was just clapping in the movie thinking that it was a good guy versus bad guy scenario no, for this film you actually have to think you. You have to reason, you have to use your critical thinking.

James:

Sorry that's not how it went. And you can come up with your own opinions about it too, which is kind of how the people in the movie do it.

Ryan:

Right, yeah, we've left. You know, disney led the way. That was the whole purpose of Zack Snyder, disney. They were there to show us that, hey, this shit we've been watching it doesn't work that way. This is garbage. The thing I made is garbage. Life is much more complicated than simply good versus evil, light versus dark.

James:

It's an opera, it's a space opera.

Ryan:

Life is a space opera.

James:

It is this life is a space opera, as is written. As is written we'll finish.

Ryan:

the last little hit of this whoo, that prohibition style whiskey is coming in hot, which is just in time because it is time for our what if scenario 1920s Prohibition medicinal whiskey.

James:

Yeah.

Ryan:

Really coming in strong here, coming in clutch. So the final portion of this show. What if the hosts of High and Dry have been cast into the Dune-iverse to fuck that Danussi James? How does the space opera change once you get your hands on that Danussi?

James:

Oh boy on that to no see, oh boy. Well, so I we usually do this in two parts where like what if you were one of the characters? Who would you be and how would you react differently? And then what if you were just there?

Ryan:

uh, so let's, we're taking on a film that's still in theaters. Fucking run with it.

James:

I don't give a shit if this is a titanic length episode so if I so, if I was one of the characters in dune, I'd be baron harkin, and obviously and I'd, uh, I'd just be going wild. No, no, I'm just kidding. Of course I'd be johnny obviously I'm joking.

Ryan:

That'd be a wild fucking thing, dude. I'm just fucking timothy chalamet or charlemagne or chalamet chalamet chalamet uh, with his lack of ass, just getting fucked by you and then he breaks your heart yeah, he'd break my heart pretty bad.

James:

I would have killed. I would have killed paul as soon as he as have killed Paul as soon as he stood up and was like I'm not going to listen to your rules for leaders and stuff. I don't give a shit about how you did things before. I would have, as Chani, just stabbed him right there. I would have totally stabbed the shit out of him. Okay, but I'm also not Chani. I was making a joke about me putting myself in the place of an indigenous woman I watched that fucking movie.

James:

Man, I would watch that movie I could make the decisions of the indigenous peoples better than they could, I would have. I would have.

Ryan:

I would watch the movie where Paul. Paul just has a gay relationship yeah, fuck, this hauls off, fucks a dude. That dude stabs him to death, that's a wild film. That's a Tarantino right there. That's some Game of Thrones shit. Yeah, that that's a wild film, yeah for sure. Well, if I had to insert myself as one of the characters, you know, my uh, latent narcissism would of course insert me as paul and and then I guess I get wrapped up in my own head, shit and um everything would just then.

James:

Essentially it would just be the movie and you, just you would just be. You would just be Paul, and you'd be like the whole movie would play out exactly the same. You'd be like that was fucking dope. I'm emperor now.

Ryan:

It's fucking dope let's have some shots, exactly how I wanted it, and there, there would just be a scene where let's have some shots. This is going exactly how I wanted it, and there would just be a scene where fucking Paul grabs up all of his friends and we're just ripping fireball, shirtless, with the boys.

James:

He's like all right, everybody, we got to party it up tonight. Tomorrow I go to bed with Zendaya and Florence Pugh.

Ryan:

That's going to be a wild scene, bro. No, no, but if so. If it was actually me, though, it, the third movie would just be emotional turmoil of being in love with zendaya, but still fucking uh, florence bue. Eventually I just crumble in on myself.

James:

That's going to be the next movie. Like I said, this would just be Paul.

Ryan:

Well, I would crumble in on myself, and then me as a more attractive Timothy Charlemagne would hop up on a chair, wrap a fucking wire around his throat and then kick out the chair.

James:

I think instead you'd blind yourself and then go wander out into the desert.

Ryan:

That's how I think it would go yeah, and then there would be that one weird dude in the back of the theater who tries to clap when it's over.

James:

It's gonna happen. I can't wait until we watch the third movie and that happens. And then there's Bruce Lee. Way to go, beautiful, go.

Ryan:

he killed it he fucking killed it from the scene, from the scene where paul ryan baron north was fucking, ripping fireball shirtless with the boys, to when he fucked both those beautiful women, to when his personality crumbled in on itself and then he killed himself Just mwah, chef's kiss.

James:

Wow, the good guys win yeah.

Ryan:

Yeah, welcome me into Dune. There it is.

James:

There you go.

Ryan:

I'd be there with you, I'd be Aly, and then I'm sure, let's fucking. We're taking shots going. That's right, baby. Yeah, no, it would be. Uh, it'd be a wild film. It'd be a wild film I, it's just me.

James:

It's just me, it's just me, with the same build and everything but like three feet tall, wow yeah that'd be a crazy fucking flick, Definitely.

Ryan:

We could only make it happen because one and two were blockbusters and then they just give me the helm Like look, dude, they're gonna. We could only make it happen because one and two were blockbusters yeah. And then they just give me the helm, Like look, they're going to come see it because they saw one and two, Do you bro?

James:

So weird. I hope it's so weird so they have an opportunity to be so weird in this next one. People love the Getty prime and people loved it.

Ryan:

Yeah, oh, yeah, it's, it's. It would be weird. Yeah, my, what if it would just be fucking weird, without a doubt, yeah, no, like people who saw the second one, like wow, I wasn't expecting paul to be shirtless ripping shots with the boys, but there he is, oh, and there he goes. He's fucking. He's trying to fuck them both at once.

James:

Wow, didn't work out, but honestly, wow, they said no, but okay he really uh, because that's essentially what happens in the next movie. It's very funny If you were it's just a translation of of what happened back then, like, of course he's on top of the world, now he's the proclaimed emperor, and then it's his descent as he he's. This path that he's sworn to walk on has made him nothing but sad.

Ryan:

Yeah, not, and, and I would, I would play it. I would. Yeah, no, and, and I would. I would play it out, I would. I would just fucking go ham on it. I got my little psychic three foot tall bitch. I'm banging this one, I'm banging that one. They don't, oh, they don't want me anymore. That's fine, I'll just fucking keep ripping my old forest prohibition style. Well, you want me to?

James:

talk to my kids fuck that, fuck that.

Ryan:

Um yeah, oh yeah, and I would just fucking spiral.

James:

Dune three is depressing it's gonna be, no matter what it's gonna be depressing.

Ryan:

There's gonna be cash and titties out everywhere, but holy shit, it is sad. It is sad, yeah, well, well, well, so so back to you, then. We're always talking, like you know, there's the two parts of the what if. Oh, what's your second part of the what if? You know, if I was?

James:

inserted into dune. Yeah, the only place I see for myself is uh is on the emperor's ship, is I was one of. I was one of the people there and we're just like what's going? On out on on dune.

Ryan:

What the fuck is happening I guess we still have a job to do right we have to go to getty prime.

James:

That doesn't sound fun, fucking freaks there, solid, solid yeah, I see, I see paul stab stab fade and I'm like, oh no, the entire power structure is uprooted. What's gonna happen to me?

Ryan:

I make two,000 a month. What happens next? No, I feel that, I feel that yeah. So for my, what if I also see a yeah, like if you just insert me into it?

James:

I would just be. I wouldn't survive in the desert. Would you be in the Fremen?

Ryan:

Well, so Like so, look, I've done the military thing. I understand the training. You know I'll train up whatever. But then I would survive, but then I would just be fucking simping after Jessica.

James:

Yeah, and there would just be. She loves simps, she loves people who follow her, then that's what I would be.

Ryan:

I'd be like, yeah, that was, that was fucking awesome. Ma'am, can we do that thing again? You called it the sloppy toppy with the reach around, and that's that's all I'd be. I would. I would just be simping after.

James:

Uh, yeah, rebecca, rebecca ferguson the whole time, and that's how the movie would change you just being one of like do you see yourself like right now is stuck in the southern part of the planet where it's like all these religious fundamentalists and you're just kind of stuck there. And then ferguson rolls in. You're like, hold on a second something from the outside world and she's hot.

Ryan:

Yeah, whoa, uh yeah, no, that would definitely be. Yeah, so I would be in the southern part of the planet, because, you know, here I am, I was born here. I'm like wow, dude, what you're saying is really fucking weird. Um, and then a worm would come in one day and my life would be turned upside down. Yeah, like whoa, I just good Lord, I found meaning in all of this. Good Lord, and it is whatever's going on with her.

James:

Yeah, and that's all that we fucking chance you just be in the background of every shot, like carrying her her litter or whatever.

Ryan:

But but then, but. But I will say this, though I think there would be a butterfly effect of change. I think there'd be a butterfly effect. You make her happy. What would happen. What would happen is Jessica, who's like, completely satisfied.

James:

Doesn't need to promote Paul to Holy.

Ryan:

War. Exactly, she does not need to bring about this Holy War because she just came eight times and she's just like sitting there like she's like trying to get her fucking balance and you know she's got like assistance holding her fucking balance and, um, you know she's got like assistants holding her up going. What the hell's going on with our messiah here?

James:

and that would fit with frank herbert's style of storytelling and writing. Uh, and another thing that he would certainly explore is that she's pregnant with alia. So they're like sharing, they're psychically sharing. She's sharing her orgasms with her fetus and that's totally something frank herbert would write about, because he's a fucking pervert, yes, and and so.

Ryan:

so inserting me into dune too, we would see that final scene right. And uh, jessica would come out. She's wearing the garb and she's like she's being held up by an assistant, you know, because her legs are fucking wobbly and the only insertion of myself into this film is me stepping out of the same room, a little like worse for wear, I'm like dabbing a cloth on my forehead and I'm wiping off my mouth, and then Jessica's like you know what, paul, this, this ain't worth it.

James:

If my son comes, don't let him drink the water of life.

Ryan:

I've changed my mind she's like, don't let him drink the water. And she just 180s about faces and walks back into her tent. And then I'm like and then you just see me look at the camera with my hands on my hips going.

James:

Work's never finished and then it's a black screen and it says and that's the end of the movie, and that's the end of the movie.

Ryan:

And, yeah, dive back in. Yeah, no, but like in the end I'd put on a snorkel and then dive back into the tent and go in real camp for the final beat audience, then the audience that one guy just clapping his ass off. Yeah, that's how it would change with me, for sure, for sure. Love it all, right. So thank you everyone. So much, so now it's time to come to the final, final, final portion of this. So, james, you weren't able to bring a notebook into the theater no, I wasn't, but I do I was yeah, you did, you were able to.

James:

Did you want to go first or?

Ryan:

well, let me fire off what I didn't get to get off in uh dune 2. Um, so let's see here uh, shield tech forced the use of swords and that was completely forgotten so.

James:

So it's interesting you bring that up. I do have something to say about that. They do mention in the first movie that they don't use shields in the desert because it draws the worms. They, they do say that. So, so a lot of that shield tech shit. They did have shields at specific times when they they weren't out of the desert. So I feel like that was purposeful that no one had out in the desert. I feel like that was purposeful that no one had shields in the desert.

Ryan:

I will concede that, yes, I am busy making Rebecca happy, so it is what it is. So then I said I love the commentary on the desire to believe. Yes, oh, yeah.

James:

The theater laughed when Stilgar gave his. It gave his like oh see, he denies it. That means it's like you know.

Ryan:

That means it's even more of a sign that he's the messiah yeah, yeah, but the theater laughed a lot of the yeah, but it's like hey guys, that was a fucking mirror and look into it, motherfuckers. And so then I also said chani is the stillgar of paul's sincerity in quotes. You remember she had made that statement of he's sincere and I'm like, well, that just makes you the stillgar, but instead of you know, quiz, a hot rock. It's just of his sincerity. Yeah, let's see. Oh, then I put, she gonna show him the way. Dot dot dot. All right, let's see. With the success of the first film, they made the Baron more vicious, something they had avoided before then. Tim Charlemagne has no ass, true, in a lot of those scenes where he's put in front of the sun and he's just a fucking straight angle all right, I love my white boy jeans yes, they chose not to explain the anatomy of the worm and how they kept it above the sand.

Ryan:

I guess that's just extra nerd shit. As written should be the new toast. Let's see here um paul made the alliance plan, not the baby in the book. Let's see here they forced us to like paul by turning against the benny jeseret. I love that. Terrorists are the heroes in mainstream media. Let's see here they went all out on Fade the Baron was weakened by a humorist. Fade let's see here. They finally gave fucking Gurney Halleck an instrument.

James:

I hate that.

Ryan:

I hate that movies now have to test the waters with the first film. Here's just a note. God damn, Rebecca.

James:

Yeah.

Ryan:

She was really great in that. I liked, I liked the henna it was very, she was also uh white savory oh yeah, but chef's kiss, I, yeah again my insert me into the film and I would just be performing fellatio the entire time. Um, let's see here.

Ryan:

Oh yeah, love that one dude holding the sword against the worms, his optimism was inspiring if you go back and watch the scene where several worms are rushing the emperor, there's one dude who doesn't run and he's just holding a sword. And yeah, his optimism was inspiring. Oh yeah, in hollywood, battles are won by the most acrobatic side I love how the new emperor looks like a young christopher walken that's pretty funny they kept the word that knocked out, the benny jesuit woman.

Ryan:

If you remember, in the uh, original version, in the 80s version of the dune film he was like and benny jesuit woman was knocked back. Yes, they kept that, I loved it. And then finally they altered chani to ball. But was that unnecessary? Because Paul becomes a soothsayer who has his shit wrecked in a gutter. But we already talked about that one. So yeah, those were my machine gun notes taken in the film.

James:

My first note is I don't know if you remember how the film opens. Do you remember the opening shot? I always think opening shots are important. The opening shot I wrote paul has a huge face because it's just like his face taking up the entire screen paul's huge face large face, no ass uh, finally a white savior. Let's see, I wish they would have had the paul stillgar worm writing scene. I really wish he was up there with him smiling.

Ryan:

They're smiling back at each other yeah, not enough. Sexual tension between paul and stillgar yeah, pretty lame uh. I. I really liked the worm writing.

James:

I I feel like, because they showed like little vents, liked the worm writing. I feel like, because they showed like little vents on the worm, that essentially you, the way I perceived it was that they open that up and so the worm doesn't want those vents that are open to be in the sand and so it has to keep them out of the sand. That's how I perceived it.

Ryan:

Yeah, but that's a lot to pick on for your average audience member. I would say the dude clapping at the end he definitely didn't get I did.

James:

I liked it, though I'm glad they did that for me, and only me, I I love the way that fremen suck the water out of the fallen sardaukar oh yeah, yeah, that was super cool.

James:

I loved how they sucked the water out of them and then, and then they brought it back, of course, for the scene where they did that with jamis's water. But, yes, super dope, I loved it. Hell yeah, our culture has no concept. What did you say? It was grim. It was grim, yeah, it was. Also it was utilitarian, and he even said, like this water is disgusting, we're not going to drink it, but it's good for cool, it's good for using as coolant. So, yeah, which I found very funny, our culture has no concept of sacred spaces, is what I? Uh is a note I took Uh, and our culture doesn't. I doesn't. I feel the united states doesn't hold anything sacred. We, we as a, as as united states american culture, don't hold anything sacred.

James:

People try to hold certain things sacred and it ends up being like the military or yeah, it's nationalism 100, the police, and it's like no, these aren't the sacred things. These aren't the sacred things because they change based on human nature. The sacred things are things that don't change based on human nature, like they're things that, but whatever like like jessica's uh vagina.

James:

Yeah getty prime is dope. The ink fireworks were super cool. Uh, I love the ink fireworks and I loved it. The the whole planet was like oversaturated. It was very cool. It kind of it kind of makes you, it kind of gives you an idea of why they're like that. If that's the planet they lived on, yeah, it's fucking. It's gotta be a shitty place to live, seems seems black and white. Yeah, oof, everything's black and white.

James:

Yeah, I wrote that woman dominated fade sexually so easily she walked in a little bit, like within like 30 minutes of meeting him, she was like all right, I'm dominating, I am totally dominating you sexually, I can get you to do anything, yeah uh-huh, yeah, no, well and well in the what-if scenario I just want.

Ryan:

That's where I would differentiate myself from fade um, because that the tendency towards narcissism would be completely overridden by the fact that every scene jessica, what it's in was now altered by she's getting eaten out, and I'm just fucking spelling the fremen alphabet all up in there is the fremen alphabet different?

James:

than it's irrelevant as far as she's concerned well, yeah well, you don't know, she, she would know she's had the water of life.

Ryan:

She would also me rolling into me, rolling in here, spelling english alphabet. She doesn't even know what the fuck I'm doing and that's why she keeps me around she's like this is the alphabet we're gonna need to move on to poetry alright, fine, I'll learn it. I'll learn it. God damn. So needy, yeah, no, and oh, eventually Paul would slit my throat, you know, just cause I'm always up in there. Paul's distracted, he doesn't care, he don't care. So that's good, I got that going for me. So it's the royal fallacious I'm spared by.

James:

Paul's lack of concern. I believe it's fallacious.

James:

Sorry the royal fallacious, I believe it's the latest, sorry the royal, the latest jessica. My last note was that, uh, there's a lot of conversation around the spectacle of the movie. I think it's important to note that it's not just good graphics and stuff I know we talked a little bit about this but it's also innovation of the shots, the way they kind of displayed the grandiosity of things where things were partially off screen, where where we moved from from wide shots to to long shots and and conveyed, conveyed like motion with the camera. All of it was amazing cinematography that created something that we couldn't look away from. It's created something that we couldn't look away from. It's not something that we just didn't appreciate. I had a hard time looking away from the screen because it was so good. When I wanted, like popcorn or whatever, I was like fumbling around in the dark because I didn't want to look away.

Ryan:

It was so good and I agree with that entirely and all commentary aside, that's a that's a fantastic place to end it because that's the bare bones of it. So for those of you who have watched the entirety of this particular production have seen that in my video here. The sun has gone down and half of my face is now completely dark. It is time to call the day on this episode. I hope you've taken something from this. I hope you're not the guy who was clapping at the end of Dune 2. Thank you all so much for listening. Remember always that all films, in comparison to Zack Snyder's Rebel Moon, are superior. Thank you all. Like and subscribe, comment and uh, as written. It is as written. Cheers, bye everybody.

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Ryan Baron North

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